all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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