I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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