i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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