the new term for farting is butt boxing.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
