If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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