she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
