he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
