No subtext here. People are naked.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Randomize
