I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
