And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
