We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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