I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
