I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
