There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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