I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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