weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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