so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
