i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
