HIV tests are more positive than that guy
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
