Nicole vs. Life
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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