? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
