Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Alive.
So much puke
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
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