what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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