Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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