Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
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