My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
