Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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