i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
