It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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