Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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