i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
