Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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