this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Randomize
