I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Acid is not a monday night drug
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
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