Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
