So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
