She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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