What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
This is my gift to your gina
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
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