The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
She is in my trunk
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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