Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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