I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Randomize
