Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I just forgot I was standing up.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
