me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
