An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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