You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
