i just wanna soil my oats bro
Michael Bay diarrhea
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
