similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
