Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
