Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
