Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
